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Apr 11 2011
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Haiti

April Haiti Trip

Our April team had several goals as we made our way to Jeremie Haiti.

1. Spend time with the kids

2. Teach them through stories, songs and crafts

3. Show them the love of Jesus

We may not have been the best teachers or crafters, but they enjoyed the activities and we certainly spent large quantities of time encouraging and loving them.  The thing that excites me the most is that they remember people, their names.  Not only did they remember me and rush to meet me as I got off the bus but they remember those of you who have been before.  They ask about you, write letters to you and try to figure out how we are all connected.  I brought several pictures with me from individuals who have been to Jeremie in the past.  The children treasure the photographs and smile so brightly that it’s hard to hold back tears.

If you haven’t been on a trip to Jeremie, Haiti.  I highly recommend that you consider it.  Not only will you impact the lives of countless orphans but I promise you the Lord will work in ways you have never seen before.

If you are a medical professional we have an urgent need to fill the spots

on the April 30th trip.

Email maribeth.burns@longhollow.com  for more information

[slideshow]

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Mar 29 2011
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Haiti

Adoption Tax Credit

Good news about the Adoption Tax Credit:

It has been extended through 2012!


The current tax credit for adoption is $13,360 and in 2012 it will be lowered slightly: $12,170.  2013 will bring the lowest adoption tax credit we’ve seen in years: $5,000 for a healthy child and $6,000 for a Child with special needs.  While the news for 2013 doesn’t look as nice as 2012 it is still encouraging for parents who will complete their adoptions in the next two years.

For a great break down on what the adoption tax credit means for you check out this post from Abba Fund.

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Mar 07 2011
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Haiti

Workshop Details

March 12th, 9am-11:30am.

Long Hollow Baptist Church

The Love a L.O.T. ministry, in partnership with Adoption Assistance Inc., will offer a free work shop for all parents interested in the adoption process on March 12th, 9am-11:30am in the Hendersonville Campus Little TreeHouse.

This workshop will be very beneficial to parents who are new to the adoption process or still considering adoption as an option for their family.

Topics will include: financing an adoption, home studies, older child adoption, international adoption, helping your child adjust and much more.

Parents will have a choice of three break-out sessions including:

1. The language of adoption, talking to others about your decision

2. Financing an adoption

3. The Home Study Process

4. Older child adoption: the joys and challenges of adopting an older child

5. You’re Home! Now what?  The first 6 months.

 

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Feb 28 2011
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Haiti

Dont Forget! March 12th!

The Love a L.O.T. ministry, in partnership with Adoption Assistance Inc., will offer a free work shop for all parents in the adoption process on March 12th, 9am-11:30am in the Hendersonville Campus Little TreeHouse.

This workshop will be very beneficial to parents who are new to the adoption process or still considering adoption as an option for their family.

Topics will include: financing an adoption, home studies, older child adoption, international adoption, helping your child adjust and much more.

The workshop is free of charge, please contact me at erica.ho@longhollow.com to reserve a spot.

Adoption Assistance Inc.

http://www.adoptionassistance.com/process.html

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Feb 23 2011
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Haiti

Your Child’s Story

Adoptive parents have the best intentions.  They really do.  After all, they have stepped outside their comfort zone, embraced a child and are now attempting to give their newest family member the best life possible.  That deserves some serious credit.  While most adoptive parents will tell you that they, not their child are receiving the blessing, there are still some serious kudos to give up for adoptive families.

That said, I would like to address these wonderful, selfless parents for just a moment.  Sometimes your best intentions are not always well thought out.  Specifically when it comes to sharing your child’s story.

Many adopted children carry a heavy load with them.  They may be the victims of neglect, loss, violence and an unnatural separation from their birth family.  Parents have the huge task of unpacking that heavy load with their child, bearing their burdens and helping them reach a place of healing.  Part of that task includes understanding the child’s story and protecting it.   Parents often divulge too much of their child’s story in an effort to help people understand why they are adopting or to prepare others to understand the child once they are home.  Try to imagine the following scenario for a moment:

You walk into a new place for the first time.  It smells odd, there are strangers everywhere, they try to talk to you but you don’t understand them.  They give you things, they hug you, they look friendly but they are really invading your space!  Now imagine that all these people who are crowding you, overwhelming you, also know the most intimate details of your life.  They know about your past, why you are here, what you did or didn’t do.  They know things that were yours to tell, when the time was right, when you were healed and ready.  Not simple things like not having enough to eat but major, life-altering events and they know it all.

What I am asking you to consider is this: how will your child be affected by what you choose to share? Parents need to protect their children not expose them.  Please consider this when you talk about your child with other people, when you update your facebook or write your blog.  While sharing their story may help you heal it does nothing to help your child.  Consider keeping a journal or private blog to help you work through the details of your child’s story.  Sharing confidential information with a few close friends or a support group is also beneficial for parents and does not override the child’s need for privacy.

In case you just read this and are thinking, what in the world can I share?

Here are some appropriate things to share about your child:

  • Their age and where they are from
  • Their personality
  • You may allude to the fact that there are some background issues to work through, but not share details
  • Pictures of your child in good spirits, photos that depict hardship should not be shared publicly.  Please be aware that some countries do not allow you to share pictures until the adoption is finalized.
  • Milestones
  • Stories about their trip home or homecoming
  • Stories about visits to their orphanage
  • Fun stories about how they are acclimating to your home, first experiences etc.

Steer Clear of:

  • References that demean the birth family/birth mother
  • Details that point to how the child was relinquished or became an orphan
  • Details about past violence
  • Medical details about the child
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Feb 22 2011
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Haiti

Adoption Workshop: March 12th

The Love a L.O.T. ministry, in partnership with Adoption Assistance Inc., will offer a free work shop for all parents in the adoption process on March 12th, 9am-11am in the Hendersonville Campus Little TreeHouse.

This workshop will be very beneficial to parents who are new to the adoption process or still considering adoption as an option for their family.

Topics will include: financing an adoption, home studies, older child adoption, international adoption, helping your child adjust and much more.

The workshop is free of charge, please contact me at erica.ho@longhollow.com to reserve a spot.

Adoption Assistance Inc.

http://www.adoptionassistance.com/process.html

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Feb 21 2011
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Haiti

Haiti, where God resides…

I recently spent a week in Haiti serving with a medical missions team from Long Hollow.  The men and women on this team served our children in Jeremie, Haiti with such love and kindness.  It was an honor to be with a group that truly gave up themselves and became the hands and feet of Jesus.

Stephanie Passons, a Physician Assistant at Long Hollow Family Practice, was a last minute addition to the team.  When she heard about the cholera affecting the Jeremie area she signed up for her second trip to Haiti.  The following is an excerpt from the blog post she wrote upon her return.

“…once our eyes are open, we cannot pretend we don’t know what to do. God who weighs our hearts and keeps our souls, knows what we know and holds us responsible to act.”

Proverbs 24:12

On the heels of my last trip to Haiti I have been struggling with putting into words how I felt, what I saw, and how God moved in that place. All I know is that He did… Being called to go back to Haiti was another life changing experience. Everything fell into place beautifully and within a week of the call I was headed back to a place I fell in love with last November. I heard someone say tonight, “I can guarantee you that there is a zero percent chance that God does not reside in that place…” After being there for a week I can testify that God does indeed reside in that place. Acclimating back to reality in America is hard because I question whether God resides in a lot of the places to which I accustom my daily living. Not that they are bad places in and of themselves, I just had a feeling in Haiti that I don’t experience here. Almost like a “God shaped hole” in your heart that is only filled by going there. The best part of missions and especially this trip is that not only does it transform those we go to serve but it transforms us. You finally begin to experience life because you die to yourself which goes along with many of the things Jesus taught us… you are first when you become last, you are great when you become the least, and you truly live when you die. A beautiful quote from Jen Hatmaker who wrote a study I just finished tonight said it better than I could ever explain:

“Missional living cures apathy better than any sermon, promotes healing quicker than any counseling, deepens discipleship more than Bible studies and creates converts more effectively than any other event.”

It transforms both the slave and its master… and it indeed transformed me yet again…

Could God be calling you to the place where He resides?

Click here for more information on Summer Haiti trips.

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Feb 14 2011
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Haiti

“How can we help?” What to do when your friends adopt.

Not every family will be called to adopt.  You might be interested in orphan care or thrilled when your good friends decide to adopt or foster a child, but God just hasn’t convicted you to take that step.  If you are in this category there are several things you can do to help your friends and fellow church members who have heard the call, obeyed and taken a step of faith.

1. PRAY FOR THEM.  In a get on your knees and beg the Father kind of way. What should you pray for?  Start with these suggestions and let their needs guide you from there.

  • Pray that the children feel safe with their new family.
  • Pray that the parents will have a steady flow of patience, strength, discernment and wisdom from above.
  • Pray for endurance, children do not attach and adapt overnight.  This can be a long and difficult journey for some.
  • Pray a hedge of protection around the family.  They will experience spiritual attacks like they have never endured before.
  • Pray that God would heal the wounds of the child(ren), that fears of abandonment and mistrust will be overcome.
  • Tell them you are praying and follow through.

2. Perform acts of service

  • Provide a meal after the children have come home.  The first few weeks are full of trials and sleepless nights.  Taking meal preparation off their hands is an incredible gift.  It is appropriate to visit with the family when you take a meal, but be careful not to stay too long.
  • Clean a bathroom, or the whole house!  You may have a hard time getting Mom to agree to this so I suggest that you call her up and say ” I am planning to help you get some housework (or laundry) done next week, I can come Monday or Wednesday at 9am, which would you prefer?”  Don’t ask if you can help, or what you can do, being direct and giving an option allows her to accept much needed help without feeling like she has to protest.  Come prepared with a little cleaning kit in tow so that you can get to work instead of asking where the cleaning supplies are.
  • Give a gift card for a restaurant or general purpose store like Wal-Mart or Target.  The families will have unexpected expenses come up, or things they need for the newest member of the family and a gift card allows them to get exactly what they need.
  • Donate clothing in the child’s size.  If a family is bringing home an 8 year old boy and your 10 year old son has a tub of outgrown clothing, offer to let mom and dad go through the items and pick out what they need.

3. Give

  • Supporting a family financially as they struggle to gather the last bits of funding to complete their adoption is a huge blessing.  A little goes a long way.
  • Buy their t-shirt, cook book or whatever it is they are promoting to raise funds.  When you sport their wares you not only contribute, but help spread the word as well.

This list is just the beginning of what you can do for an adoptive or foster care family.  The widely circulated saying “it takes a village to raise a child” may not be altogether correct but in my opinion it definitely takes “a village” or in this case “a church” to adopt a child.

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Feb 11 2011
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Haiti

love a l.o.t. Live from Haiti

I am currently spending my days with about 136 orphans in Jeremie, Haiti.  Let me tell you, there’s probably no better way to spend your time. 

Our team arrived last Saturday and we have been hard at work giving immunizations to the kids and responding to their medical needs as well as those of the community around the orphanage.  The team has exhausted themselves, given all and been greatly rewarded in exchange.  It has been such an honor to hold a feverish child and be the instrument that brings them to health again.  I have wept so many times when a child comes with something as simple as an ear infection, gets treated, and then just cries for someone to hold them, comfort them.  Think of the simple things we do for our children on a daily basis.  Stroking their face with a cold cloth, or giving tylenol and tlc during a virus.  That is a luxury that few orphaned children experience.  I am so thankful for the work ESMI (El Shaddai Ministries) is doing in Haiti and so overwhelmed by the part that Long Hollow is allowed to play in that ministry. 

Gerald has been working with a group of the older children doing some music therapy related exercises.  He is a wonderful teacher and it has been so special for us all to hear the singing coming from his classroom.

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Jan 27 2011
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Haiti

Let’s Talk Adoption

Have you ever been in the midst of an adoption discussion?  Most likely you heard words like, referral, dossier, home study and waiting thrown around as if everyone with a brain should immediately comprehend what in the world that all means.  I remember doing some initial research on adoption before we started our process and I couldn’t for the life of me figure out the correct way to pronounce dossier.  (which, by the way, is pronounced Dos-ee-ay)  Consequently, I avoided using the term until I heard our social worker say it at least 6 times.  Only then did I tentatively throw it into the mix during conversations.  For those of you who are new to the adoption process or have friends/family in the adoption process, I have put together a little list of adoption terms.  Hopefully this will arm you for those obscure references and make you feel like part of the club rather than someone trying to decipher a foreign language.

Dossier: A set of legal documents which are used in an international adoption to process a child’s adoption or assignment of guardianship in the foreign court.  This thing is nuts to compile, basically a full time job.  If your friend is currently putting one of these together it’s probably appropriate to a. offer child care or b. bring meals thrice weekly.  Adoptive parents typically sleep with this under their pillow in case of fire.

Home Study: A process through which prospective adoptive parents are educated about adoption and evaluated to determine their suitability to adopt.  Parents will also spend a significant amount of time compiling documents and fearing social workers during this time.  Good news?  The social workers are actually pretty fabulous.

Waiting: Pretty straight forward.  This comes after all documents have been turned in to the right people and before you are matched with you child.

Matching: The process of bringing together qualified prospective adoptive parents and willing birth parents who are compatible with each other and who can agree on the terms under which the adoptive parents can adopt the child.  Many times there are not birth parents involved in the process, in this instance the agency will match a child to a family based on age, family status and many other factors.

Referral: A child referral is when an agency matches what they know about you and your family with what they have learned about a child from an orphanage and the caregivers.  This is a HUGE day for families in the waiting process.  They will receive their child’s picture and files on referral day.  Basically an all out tear-fest.  Typically the family will allow an international pediatrician to view the file and offer advice.

Equally important to terms used in adoption are the terms used to talk about the child and the circumstances surrounding the adoption.  Not all topics surrounding an adoption are appropriate to ask/talk about.  Families have every right to keep elements of their child’s adoption private.  However, if you are in a situation that allows for some of this discussion to take place it is a good idea to utilize the following terminology.  The following list is from the Focus on the Families “I care about orphans” website.

Accurate

Birthparent

Birthmother/birthfather

Parents/mom/dad

My child/Their child

Making an adoption plan

Deciding to Parent

Child in foster care

Waiting Child/Child in need of family

Birth Child

International adoption

WAS adopted

Physically abused

Typically developing child

Child with Special Needs

Incorrect

Real Parent/natural parent

Real mom/real dad

Adoptive parent/adoptive mom/adoptive dad

Adopted child/own child

Giving away/relinquishing/putting up for adoption/put up

Keeping the baby

Foster child

Adoptable/eligible/available

Child of their own (very offensive)

Foreign adoption

Is adopted

Beaten/hit

Normal child

Special Needs Child

If you just read the list and have come to conclusion that you have probably offended everyone you know who is currently in the adoption process, that’s probably not the case.  However, it is important to be sensitive when speaking about certain subjects pertaining to adoption.  Adoption IS something to celebrate, but adoption is also the result of an unnatural break in a child’s history.  We owe it to them to treat their stories with dignity and respect.

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